Learning to Cope

My mom has been feeling ill for a couple of weeks. She's had a cough that causes her pain, sciatica, which has to do with a pinched nerve in her leg, and has just been feeling bad in general. She went to the doctor yesterday morning and he called last night. Said that he'd gotten the results of her blood work and didn't like it, and that she should go to the emergency room right away. My dad took her, and they've been running various tests. This evening, I learned that the doctors think it's either a viral infection, or something more serious. They're going to run another test in the morning that should determine which. The results will be in in about a week. I'm praying until then.

But I'm not blogging only to recruit more prayers. I've found that Facebook is great for creating prayer chains, and I've been blessed by the amount of commentary on my statuses, assuring me that prayers are going up and that I can call if there's anything my friends can do. These are truly appreciated. But something hard like this brings me to think about what I do to cope, to remain strong enough to get through. I'd like to share these with you.

My dad has gone to the hospital about four or so different times over the past five years, three of which ended with another stint placed in an artery near his heart. When things like this happen, you have a choice: you can worry and ask why and despair, or you can trust God. You can believe that He would not let something happen if there was not good to come of it in some form, and you can trust that no matter the confusion in your own mind, He knows how it will play out. He has the diagnosis and the cure. Sometimes He chooses to heal directly, and sometimes He lets it run through the various forms of healing that He placed on this earth. Either way, at the end of the day, all I want to choose is faith.

I'm not saying that it's easy; there are reasons for terms such as "trial by fire" and that it's "darkest before the dawn". My sister, Kate, set as her status a quote from Peter Marshall -
"When we long for life without difficulties, remind us that oaks grow strong in contrary winds and diamonds are made under pressure."

It's so very true. I would not be close to God, learning to depend on Him, if I had nothing to depend upon Him for! If I had nothing precious and close to me to trust Him with, then I would never learn complete and true trust. My character would not be strengthened through the opposition. When our relationships with those around us are put to test, they expose "fair weather friends" and those who will ride through the storm with you. No simple friendship is as strong as the one that has survived the hurricane. Whatever you believed before, you now have the proof that this person is trustworthy. In the same way, leaning on God through life will show you just how worthy He is of our love and our trust. He is the one who will, "never leave you nor forsake you." (Hebrews 13:5, emphasis added). And, unlike your friends, He knows how your circumstance will run its course, and exactly how He will take it from something wholly bad to something used for good.

To comment on a practical side, it's a good idea to occupy oneself while in between things. While I'm waiting to hear what's going on with my mother, not only can I pray, but I can do dishes, laundry, generally clean house; keep up with my schoolwork, keep people informed, and generally make use of my time. I feel better when I'm getting something done. Even if the task seems minimal and mundane, it's often the familiar routine that helps me get through an unexpected situation. It reminds that not everything is changed and upset, brings a leveling, consistent factor to the mix, and reassures that life will go on, come what may.

I had to jump up and deal with a large spider before finishing the last paragraph. The thing was creeping on the wall behind my desk, dropped to the floor and ran for the cover of my dresser when I went after it. I had to use a straw to poke at it, sending it back out into the open. It ran across the floor and under my bed. I finally nabbed it with some toilet paper when it paused by the wall. I squished it and flushed it down the toilet for good measure.

Don't be fooled. These things freak me out. But I needed to take care of it for my peace of mind. I'm not going to sleep well if I know that it's loose about my room. Every unexpected movement from it made me jump. But I dealt with it anyway. I got through it and was victorious without any real issue. Yeah, it's just a spider, but it proves a point:

if you're willing to face your fear, you might just be surprised by what God will enable you to conquer.

So my mom's in the hospital, but my God knows for how long. He knows how each step of this twist of life will play out, and He'll give me and my family what we need to get through it. He is faithful, all the time.

Psalm 36:5 - Your unfailing love, O Lord, is as vast as the heavens;
your faithfulness reaches beyond the clouds. (NLT)

Psalm 117 - O PRAISE the Lord, all you nations! Praise Him, all you people!

For His mercy and loving-kindness are great toward us, and the truth and faithfulness of the Lord endure forever. Praise the Lord! (Hallelujah!) (Amplified Bible)