A Post with Flair

On Facebook, I tend to obsess over my flair collection. If you look through it, you'll find little bits of me, nicely packaged as bright buttons. I'm quite sure that I pay more attention to it than any of my friends have even considered paying it. All the same, if they do decide to check them out more thoroughly (maybe I'll get them curious by the end of this post), then they might be surprised.

For instance, one of my favorite pieces declares, "It's not who you are that holds you back, it's who you think you're not." This has been so very true in my life. In insecurity, spawned from bad experiences and lies, I've insisted to myself that it can't be me; I won't make that shot, I'll look dumb trying to dance, I can't draw like that, poetry isn't coming out of my pen, and NO way is someone going to pick me over her (or him. The point is the feeling of inadequacy, in whatever situation). I mean, why would they? It's just not happening.

Along the way, however, each of these things have been proven wrong. Therefore, I AM capable of these things. It's inside of me. They're all small parts of who I am. I can make a 3-point shot.

BUT, here comes Fear. Fear says, "Hello, I'm going to eat you, so hold still." and proceeds to open his big fat mouth. He'd like very much to eat me alive. Fresh, spirited heart is his favorite thing, after all. And since he's not a very fast runner, Fear positions himself between me and my goal. He doesn't want to have to chase me down to get to me, may as well hit me where I'm already focused. We'll say that he's right smack between me and that basketball hoop. Picture a SciFi freeze-ray in his hand, too.

Me, I don't have much time to get the ball down the court and into the air before the buzzer sounds. Either I can let Fear freeze me by standing still (an open shot), I can pass the ball and run out of time (not to mention the risk of capture. My teammates are well covered by the defense), or I can push past Fear and shoot the ball.

Now, let's say that I've made that shot several times. It's very possible for me to make it. It's part of who I am, as I have that ability. I know how to judge the shot and throw the ball with enough power to cover the distance, because I've practiced. So why wouldn't I? Because Fear is one ugly monster. He's standing there, waiting to devour me. I'm quite afraid that I'll miss, and everyone will laugh/be mad at me for even trying.

The game is tied.

I HAVE to make this shot.

I can't go talk it through with a friend first for encouragement, either.

I glance at Leslie, the best player on the team, and I freak. I shouldn't've taken that ball down the court, she should have. I am such an idiot for thinking I could do it, knowing the time constraint. Pressure builds, I lose my focus. I crash into Fear, throw the ball halfheartedly, and the crowd can't help but be vocal in their disappointment, as it falls terribly short and one of my opponents catches it. Game over.

Now, what stopped me? The fact that I can make that shot (Who I am), or that Leslie can make it (who I think I'm not)? I don't stop because I can. I stop because I fear that I can't. I don't think much of myself as it is, but if I screw up and literally "drop the ball", maybe they won't like me at all. Maybe my friends will ditch me for trying something when I should've known better.

Bye-bye epic goal of the season.

Now, let's rewind, and pretend we still have the three choices: freak out/fear, pass to a guarded teammate (completely ditching your chances), take the shot.

Philippians 4:13 - "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me." (NKJV)

When people quote this verse, they tend to think of being able to lift a boulder over their heads. But God doesn't often give supernatural physical strength, though you can read about Samson to know that He has and can. Here, Christ strengthens our hearts to get through every hardship and painful experience (all things) that we have to deal with in this life.

Not to mention, those times where we've just seen so much pain, that it's hard to believe something good is happening. Oftentimes, it feels like too much to grasp it, because we're risking intense sorrow upon finding out that it's not. A hope shattered is a cruel thing.

Lord knows, sometimes we need more strength to risk something good or beautiful, whether an opportunity, a relationship/friendship, or that moment of victory, than when we need to suck it up and tough it out.

I'm here to tell you to take the shot.

And yes, this started with Pieces of Flair.